


Pull Away

by Viridian_Z



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-08
Updated: 2019-06-08
Packaged: 2020-04-19 17:41:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19137529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Viridian_Z/pseuds/Viridian_Z
Summary: My take on what Lena would do when she figures out Kara is Supergirl.





	Pull Away

**Author's Note:**

> I had this written at the end of season 3 and before season 4 started so I hope I did it some justice.

Lena doesn’t push Kara away as harshly as she wanted to when she figures out Kara and Supergirl are one and the same. After all the trust. The rescues. Shared confessions. Reign and Sam. Juru. James sent to check her vault. Kara throwing her family name in her face. The kryptonite. The damned synthesized kryptonite. She should’ve known it would be the literal kryptonite to their friendship. She doesn’t know how Kara Danvers can pretend to defend and then demonize her in the same breath as Supergirl. But it was always Kara in the end who made those choices. The betrayal cuts deep with how far she let Kara in. Luckily, Lena knows how to bandage her wounds.

She starts slow, not joining Kara and her friends as often for outings and Game Nights. It’s done easily enough, pouring resources into repairing the city and the DEO maintaining the peace. It’s easy to pretend they have separate lives when they meet up once or twice a month between the reconstruction, attacks made by aliens and humans, and assassination attempts. She’ll stomach through the pain of everyone knowing who Kara really was except her.

She’d seen this coming even before Reign came into the picture and fractured every personal relationship she had. Surprisingly breaking up with James was one of the most amicable breakups. He understood. Even though he didn’t break into the vault, he understood Lena didn’t want to be with someone who was used to go behind her back. Let alone trust them. She leaves him in charge of Cat Co, going back to L-Corp and buries herself in work.

The walls she once let down spring back up more easily than she had anticipated. Everything settles back into their boxes. Good.

She accepts Kara’s invitations to lunches and dinners. Kara rambles about her day or anything of interest while Lena tries to stay in the present. The reporter is none the wiser to her internal turmoil. She fakes the smiles and it hurts far more than she imagined. Ignoring the thought being around Kara feels like coming home. Felt like coming home.

She starts declining chances to be alone with Kara, citing she has work to do in the lab and won’t know when she’ll be done. That’s the truth. Least the truth for different reasons.

Jess starts revoking Kara’s access over the weeks at Lena’s request while the CEO locks herself in the labs. Her assistant does, concern growing as each day passes with no sign of the reporter. Jess asks one day when they have a quiet lunch together if they had a bad breakup. Ironic, seeing how Lena was in love with Kara. She didn’t have the bravery to tell Kara before everything happened. Lena wants to keep it to herself that Kara and she were never dating in the first place. By now, she knows what keeping the wrong secret does. “I’ve never told her Jess.” The truth slips through, losing what little appetite she had. Jess nods and doesn’t bring up the subject afterwards.

She figures out a way to destabilize the Harun-El until it’s rendered inert and destroys it and any way of recreating it. Doesn’t mean she forgets how to make it. Even though it means having to look for a different method for a cure. Better to have nothing visible or possibly incriminating they can use against you if they think you’ve done something again. 

Sam’s back as CFO of the company. Lena’s surprised, considering there’s still reminders of Reign’s terror across National City and from Sam herself. The dark bags under Sam’s eyes. The way she suddenly flinches and looks around in a daze during meetings. Sam trying to keep the panic down when calling her after a nightmare. Sam hugging her as if she’ll disappear without another person to anchor her. Lena doesn’t see any of that during a late dinner. Sam smiles softly, looking at Lena as she leans forward on the table and holds Lena’s hand in her own. “You helped save me as best you could Lena. I’m not abandoning you.” Lena can tell by the sadness directed her way Sam knows more than she lets on. She always did.

It’s taken too long but she finally has enough courage to do this. Coming back from a two weeklong business trip, she sinks into her couch, nursing a bottle of whiskey in one hand and phone in the other. She’s already weighed the pros and cons of going through with this. She deletes James’ number. Winn’s. Eliza’s. Hank’s. Maggie’s. Alex’s. She doesn’t hesitate before deleting Kara’s number. She feels lighter, finally able to breathe for the first time in months. Could be the alcohol helping. She breaks her phone against the floor before heading to bed and has a new phone and different number by the time she walks into her office the next morning.

Kara marches into her office one afternoon with Jess trailing right behind her, apologizing all the while. She dismisses her with a small smile, saying this will only take a moment.

Kara goes straight to the point and asks why she’s not in her life anymore. Why none of them see her anymore. Why there’s no contact between any of them. Normally the pout and puppy-dog eyes would make her cave in and tell Kara everything. But this isn’t her norm any longer. Hasn’t been with the walls she had to rebuild and reinforce to protect herself. Lena stops typing and stands, staring Kara down with a coldness Kara’s only seen directed at other people. Never at herself. “I think you know why Supergirl. Now leave before I call security. I have work to complete.” Lena sits back down and focuses on her computer, only looking up once Kara’s left her office. She’s surprised it doesn’t hurt to finally let Kara and the last thread of the life she built here go. It shouldn’t. She lost Kara long before then.


End file.
